It always starts the same way. Such a beautiful, romantic, full of love story.
If you’re lucky there’s a good chance that you’ll get to really know him before moving into shared living.
But the truth is that you don’t know him and he don’t know you, at least not until you move in together and live together for several months.
All the cute things he did before living together may suddenly be the most annoying things on earth… (yeah, even those gay gift boxes).
When we moved in together it was hard for both of us.
From 2 single gay men who used to live their life by they own, suddenly we have to put more attention to everything.
So, as an experienced gay couple who live together for a while (10 f@!king years!), here’s our list of 5 things you should know BEFORE move in together.
Our solutions for being a gay couple who lives together
- There is no such thing as “it’s time”
Don’t move in together under any pressure! If you’re excited to move in with him, that’s a good sign.
If you’re not, maybe your heart just isn’t there (yet…). Try to distinguish between excitement and logical pressure from anxiety that tries to warn you of a wrong move – listen to your intuition and, if you need to – run away!!
- Get A-Life: Respect your space
You should feel comfortable in your home, So I’ll say it simply – respect his space too.
Don’t mess with his stuff, you don’t need to know where is he all the time and don’t tell him what you thought about every single minute of your day. Some privacy is essential, some mystery is necessary and most importantly, Space.
You’re not one person and should not become one. What you moved into together is a beauty, but you don’t have to do it all together.
- Treat the house like a new business that you started together
Whether you live alone, with partners or with partners, you probably learned a thing or two about the challenges of home care. There are two ways to divide the household chores:
- Roster – Once your turn and once his turn
- Inclination and skills – If he connects more to his “male side” and prefers to hang things, build a coffee table and take down the garbage – let him do it. If it’s ripe – cook and do the dishes.If you both are lazy – get a maid! ASAP! Or else your home is gonna look like a big mess
- Don’t stop having sex
When a gay couple move in together (or actually, any couple…), sex can very easily become self-evident, not exciting, and a routine. No matter how hard you try, drastically and quickly reduces sexual desire.
The fact that he sees your graceful face every morning and hearing your snoring every night – can change your sexual dynamic.
Suddenly when you meet, you’re not very organized, you are not well groomed, and slowly you may lose sexual tension.
Make sure you have a healthy sex routine, set romantic dates, outdoors, even though you live together.
The fact that you are returning to the same bed does not mean that there is no point in going out or that every Friday night has to end up on the couch.
- Make yourself a gift routine
Like we said before, you have to keep your relationship alive, even if you live together. As a gay couple who addicted to gift boxes, our recommendation is to make sure you have regular days (for example, once a month) when you give each other a gift.
It doesn’t matter the value or size of the gift, but the thought of each other. it will make you remember him and not take it for granted in your daily routine.
It doen’t matter if you’re a gay couple who just move in together or a straight couple who married for 20 years – keep loving and caring your partner.
Kim and Adi
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